The Potty Dance

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My independent, assertive, little man has decided to take a stand.  Against potty training, that is. I keep telling myself “He will do it whenever he is ready” and “Boys start potty training later than girls,” but it’s getting to a point of frustration for my husband and me. I’m trying not to stress over it, but I feel like we have been dancing around this subject since our son turned 3- the subject of the potty dance, specifically- and while my husband and I are dancing, Branden sits and observes. This thought keeps me pondering over the question:

How do I engage my child in ‘The Potty Dance’?

After talking to many friends and family and reading many articles online, I’m learning that every child is potty trained differently, and at a different time during their toddler years. At this point, I feel like we have tried every trick in the book, but the only response I get from my little man is “I can’t do it!” Of course, we explain to him over and over that he can do anything he puts his mind to, and that “can’t” should not be a part of his vocabulary. But he’s 3, so ya know, this concept goes a little over his head.

Part of me is also worried that I am going to discourage him and make him feel bad about himself if I keep pressuring him to do something that he knows he’s not ready to do. Overall, it’s a very nerve racking, touchy subject for a parent.

After scouring the Internet lately, I have come across a really great resource, the Baby Center. This website provided a Potty Training Readiness Checklist, which outlines physical, behavioral, and cognitive signs that show if your child is or isn’t ready for the potty training process. After going through this list point by point, I have realized that while many children may be very advanced in other areas, there are specific day to day ways that show us parents if they are really ready or not for this important step. Just like everyone else in this world, children all have stronger points and weaker points, and it’s obvious that each of us learns how to do certain things faster than others.

This experience with my son has taught me some patience and made me realize that it’s not a competition, but instead a learning experience for both children and their parents. I need to take a look at the big picture and not put so much pressure on Branden and/or myself, and just take a chill pill for goodness sakes! As my editor recently reminded me, all kids seem to be miraculously potty trained by the time they hit college, LOL! Now there’s perspective for you!

Everything happens in its own time, and as I’m learning, in Branden’s own time, as well.

I would love to hear if my lovely readers have any great potty training tricks, or if you have shared a similar experience as I have! Comment below or send me an email!

Fashionably Yours,



  1. Laurie Klatscher says:

    Oh, man, I remember how stressed I was over this issue with my son. He was so verbally mature that I somehow expected him to get the potty training together quickly and easily. Not so much…and honestly, I can’t even remember now how and when it wasn’t an issue any more. But your editor is quite right, and so are you. He’ll sort it out and doing that without pressure is the better path. I tried once to give my son gold stars on the side of his bunk bed as a reward for his going to the potty. He looked at me we utter distain. We laugh about it now.

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